It's only tuesday once a week!

Woah, did I really miss out the whole of 2010 without posting? Well I sure did. Since my last post back in December 2009 theres been a few changes to my general situation, I've broken a heart and had mine broken. What a pansy. I've lived in three different houses, but managed to keep a job at The Lounge throughout. Also managed to fail the biggest exam of my life. Thanks Mr Coastguard, thanks.

Part of the reason for neglecting posting has been because my beloved iPhone died. I dropped it on the floor of the pub last June. I was playing guitar and just dropped it, 3 and a half foot. Dead. Still miss the bloody thing.

My social gaffs of late have revolved around being a bitter jilted lover, to post about it on the Internet so soon, would probably be a bit "Zuckerberg". There is one story that sticks out and shows clearly my social ineptitude in chatting up the fairer sex, cut me some slack however. I have been out of the 'game' for 5 years and 8 months.

It was a Wednesday night in the Lounge, good atmosphere, live music and the ale was flowing. This was five days after getting the heave ho, so I was absolutely blootered. Sitting with all the guys with daft storys being exchanged and theres a girl in the corner across the pub.She's sitting with her Mum and Dad. For future reference Ross, when a girl is sat with her Mother and Father, don't do the following; wait until all three go up to the quiz machine and ask this classic "Excuse me, what are you doing tomorrow? Do you want to go to the Sauna at the health suite?"

Sober Ross , in my head, is shouting and screaming "WHAT THE SHIT ARE YOU DOING? THE SHITTING SAUNA FOR SHITS SAKE" All of the lads at the table are stunned, but listening intently. To be fair this girl dealt with it expertly "Erm sorry I've got work tomorrow" this is where things get hazy. I think my subconscious doesn't want me to remember. Never fear, it's been recounted to me many times. "Oh okay where do you work?" Sober Ross breathes a small sigh of relief.

"I work at the care home."
"So you wipe bums for a living?"
"Someone has to."
"Ahhh saving the world one bum at a time."

No. Just No.